Worst Experience. Ever!...Well, Worst Experience Of Today. Ever!

QUIET THE HELL UP!

On the run up to confirming the purchase of my new house (I know! Exciting, right?!), there are a million to-do lists with a million items on each of those lists, to actually do.

And so, I found myself in a queue today. No big deal, not for a big boy like me. I can wait. Patience comes easy for me (Ha!).

It was fine, actually. Honest. There was even some music playing in the background, a convenient distraction from my apparent observation that time had slowed so much I thought I would soon be starting school all over again.

Enter Thug 1 and Thug 2.

Thug 1, for the next 5 hours of my life that I'll never get back (WARNING! - Slight exaggeration ALERT), peppered his highly cerebrally stimulating dialogue with statements such as -

"This sucks..."
"F*&%, this really sucks..."
"We'll be f*&%ing here all day at this f*&%ing rate.."
"This sucks, man..."

He espoused his theory that a certain athlete was "sh*t" and that he "sucked".

Thug 2, all the while, was equally matched in terms of his intellectual prowess. He regularly responded to his mate with -

"Yeah..."
"Uhhu..."
"This sucks, man..."

Two young ladies ahead of us in the queue that I thought would be responsible for me taking my own life, were seen, in order, and left.

I then had to listen to -

"I should have f*&%ing tapped those chicks!"
"I would throw my f*&%ing *BLEEP* at them!"

...Like they had a chance in hell. Oh, wait, hell was this queue, forever and ever, oh deary me!

Then they saw a magazine. The male model on the cover caught Thug 1's eye, and what followed was a really interesting conversation about how not only did the model look gay, but that he looked so gay, the magazine probably had some gay diseases all over it, and so they couldn't possibly touch it.

These guys were in their thirties!

Reality check - Is this still 2011? Are people in Australia not supposed to be relatively well educated?

I said nothing, as I am civilised (and half of Thug 1's size), and detest violence and aggression (unless I win!). But I really wish I could have said what I wanted to, and turn to find crowds applauding me.

Maybe next time.