So What Happens When You Die?

Death. It seems people never speak about death unless they have lost someone or unless they are off to have a reading from a psychic, hoping dearly for a message from the great beyond.
Death is all around us. Drama on television uses the death of characters to drive story lines forward. There are adverts for life insurance everywhere you look. And none of us are getting any younger.

But do we ever really talk about death?

Occasionally people will talk about something odd happening at home, and are quick to blame a nameless ghost. But is there such a thing as a ghost? Do we really survive beyond death?

Death seems so final. Can it be anything else but final?

I’m a Registered Nurse. I have cared for people as they come to terms with news their life is nearing an end, and as that end comes to pass.

No two people I have cared for have ever met their end in the same way. Relatives and friends also have their own unique methods of coping with this natural process. The thing about death is that even when you know it’s coming, it’s usually a surprise.

Some people turn to God. Some turn to religion. The two are not the same. Others are very pragmatic, and make plans and clarify with loved ones what is to happen, as they die, and afterwards.

Some cry. Some scream. Some strike out violently. Others just go quiet and still.

Some choose to not acknowledge what is happening.

Denial.

It’s my view that denial is a valid coping strategy. It can help a person to function, when otherwise they would crumble and spend their last days and hours not able to effectively live. People who know they are going to die can live more fully than those of us without this knowledge. It seems odd, at first, that people in poor health can be so full of life, but it makes sense to me.

If you had a week to live, what would you do? Sleep for a week in a dark room, or get out and spend time with people you love, doing things you enjoy?

Of course, some people don’t have much of a choice when their poor health dictates they must be in bed. The death process is unique to everyone.

But what is death? When someone dies, they no longer breathe. Their heart stops beating. They grow cold and no longer move. A dead person no longer eats, works, talks, laughs or does anything we take for granted when alive.

There are no more hugs, or sharing of ideas. The person is no longer present.

In medicine, brain death is the absolute necessary criteria to be declared dead. But this isn’t even as simple as it may sound, and different criteria may be applied to define a legal death, depending on the circumstances and depending on what country you are in.

Philosophers and scientists still continue to debate and define exactly when death occurs, and exactly what it is. Is it enough to say death is simply when life ends? Not for some.

And afterwards, do we go to heaven? Or perhaps we are reborn, given another opportunity to live, learn and understand the nature of things? Or perhaps it really is the end. Those who die leave us forever, never to be seen or heard of again.

Most people have an idea, at least, of what they believe happens when death comes, but no one really knows. Not for sure.

What do you believe?