My Life, The Weird And The Bad

I did say I was going to post about my bad, or strange luck. Is there such a thing as luck? I would say there are some people who seem to be naturally lucky. I am sad that I am not one of them.

It is not all about money. BUT, in all the time the UK's national lottery has been running, I think I may have won £10 twice. There are some people who win every week. EVERY WEEK. Amazing.

I crashed my car yesterday, as already posted. When I came home, I parked in my drive, which is on a slope. My partner and I came in the house. I was getting ready for my bath, while going through some mail. I asked my other half to get me something from my car. He shouted on me. He wanted me to look at something. When I looked out, I couldn't believe what I saw. My life is like a carry on film sometimes. My car had slid onto the road, due to the ice and snow.

Last week I had flushed a toilet duck (toilet freshener) and blocked it. Hours later, and after much blood, sweat, tears and money, we gave up and had to get a professional plumber in. The man was in the house for eight, yes 8, minutes. Job sorted.

When we first moved into this house, the central heating did not work. We had moved house in the middle of winter, so we desperately needed heating. There was an electric fire in the living room, and it didn't work either. Or so we thought. Weeks went by.

There was a little switch in the kitchen. We would turn it on and off occasionally, but nothing happened and we were left scratching our head as to what it's purpose was. Well, it was for the electric fire in the living room!

The layout of the house meant that when we standing at the switch, turning it on and off, the view of the living room, where the fire was, was obscured.

We had been turning the fire on and off, for weeks, completely oblivious of what we were doing. Meanwhile we suffered the harsh Scottish winter, needlessly.

Then there was the first time I washed the windows. When I opened one of the bedroom windows...it kept going. The whole window turned out and over. It should have been fixed securely by two brackets. One was not attached. The other was now bent as far as it could go, and the worse thing was my car was parked directly beneath this window. Luckily I managed to hold on to the window til help came.

I remember years ago, a really strange incident. One night, quite late on, I had finished my shift, and was standing at a bus stop. I was approached by a woman, who was very eager to talk to me. She asked for a cigarette. She was politely informed that I do not smoke.

She then informed me she was in great need of relieving herself. On the main street of the town in which we were in, she pulled her trousers and underwear to her ankles. I turned away. I could hear her "tinkle".

Then it dawned on me. I was on a hill! The urine was heading straight for me. I stepped onto the road to escape it.

Once this woman had finished, she then wanted to cuddle me. I found myself ducking and diving to avoid her embrace (she hadn't washed her hands!).

She began to speak of the time she had put me in a freezer. She also stated she had brought oil to the town we were in, and had worked long and hard with the Gurkha's to accomplish this. She openly mocked people who had wanted to build a yellow bus out of carrots. She thought this would be crazy of them, as carrots are orange!

When my bus finally came, she screamed, "NO!!!". She placed herself on her knees in front of the bus shouting and screaming that it should not assist my departure. The bus driver had to reverse and pull out and around her.

Not a common occurrence.

I could list many incidents like that, but I will leave them for another post.